The 2013 UK Trip Retrospective

Why did it take close to a week to write a retrospective on the trip? In all honesty, I believe that a trip's significance can't fully be realized until you have to adjust from it. Sure, you get off the plane and sit around your house a few days adjusting to sleep, but it isn't until you have to adjust to normal life that you begin to think about the good times and just why the trip could be seen as a necessity. A rather expensive one, but nonetheless, a necessity. In a sense, it is like recovering from a hangover and trying to figure out why you drank in the first place. Hopefully it was for the memories.

The odd feeling that I have developed over the past few months is this odd connection to Joaquin Phoenix's character in the Master. It isn't the broad scope that I feel like I am being manipulated, but there is the sense of not quite understanding the world around you. In England, I felt that at a higher ratio, though for really obvious reasons. If you see the film and try and piece together the relativity, it will not make entire sense. Just know that I feel like Phoenix embodied a desire to find direction, but never quite found a reason to follow anyone but himself. As dumb as it sounds and as much as I try not to make everything about movies in my life, that is how I felt at times. No ifs, ands, or buts. 

But let's move on. This feels reductive. Let us start with the post and eventually move into the pre. The last that everyone heard, I was arriving in Los Angeles, bored out of my mind and just wanting to find stimulants. I was even worried that I couldn't drive a car properly from being disconnected for so long. In fact, the following day wasn't exactly a cake walk like I hoped. I was too aware that the world was moving, and I needed to catch up. In fact, I was heading out to see Zero Dark Thirty at least four times just to come to the conclusion that I needed to buy school books, or even give my sister a call. There were things to do, and I ended up spending that day catching up on loose ends. That is, before abusing David's Taco Tuesday and going to his house for dinner and watching Aziz Ansari's "Dangerously Delicious" (seriously, it was his idea). 

I have honestly felt odd about the lack of attention that has been surrounding my trip. With exception to a few short hurrahs, the talk faded. It was partially because I just have a sloppy way of slowly displaying interesting. At least I think I do it for show, but I don't know why. I expected big dinners and to be the center of attention. I was, but for a brief window. Then it was time for everyone to get ready for another day of work and me to figure out how I was going to catch up on close to 10 TV recaps as well as school.

However, the significance of the trip didn't really settle in until that Wednesday when I went into work. It was a throwaway, four hour shift. As I was bagging, I immediately noticed the physical and mental changes. While I have long stopped associating cynicism with my daily grind, I noticed a certain level of calm that made things almost too lackadaisical. I worry that the trip made me lazy, but my hand-eye technique wasn't really bothered. It was slower, and I wasn't in a rush anymore. There was this calming peace over me, and I felt... optimistic. True, Sunday rolled around and the Super Bowl picked up business, but I just haven't felt the overpowering sense of focus that I used to have. I still work hard and mutter bad things, but not at such a disaffected rate as I used to.

On another note, I am looking back on stuff that I have written during that time, and I must admit that I captured the trip nicely. That is besides the cursing. Now, I know that I am not as bad as I used to be, but almost every time I got on Facebook, I threw out a casual swear, and it makes me laugh. It wasn't a mean curse. Just a casual swear. Either that means that I loosened up, or I have resorted to that level of prose again.

If you want me to put a face to the people that I referenced a lot during my stay, these two people are the Katey Rich and Matt Patches that I referenced in terms of Sundance coverage almost every day (I don't know the legality to cropping a photo from their videos, but do know that I do not own it and you can watch it here). They have given me so much optimism for the year as I discover more and more that I probably will not be seeing any big tent pole releases this year (that's right, you Star Trek, X-Men, and Iron Man sequels). However, I will have a few to keep an eye out for. Thanks so much. My cohorts at CinemaBeach also did coverage, though as a devout Operation Kino listener (do those exist?), I also really respect these guys opinions and may be the one shining hope on me being in my 20's and wanting to pursue film journalism.

Same spiel here. I do not own these videos. You can watch them here.

Yes, I do have a growing love for everything Anne Marsen, and her choice to record daily Vlogs with her boyfriend in lieu of filming a music video was also opportune in timing. While I do not feel that they are necessary to anyone who doesn't already care, they have kept me entertained and again, just an inspiration for me to keep going. Yadda yadda yadda. Basically, I want to get into smaller talents this year, and if you haven't seen Girl Walk // All Day despite all my complaining. Please do. Going on three months of obsession here. If anything, I get a better sense of who Marsen is as a performer and while that means nothing really, well, those lonely hours in a bedroom overlooking the Queen's Head were made slightly more entertaining. And yes, I do kind of adore her still.

Now that I have all of that out of the way, I just want to say that I am doing fine. I am a little behind because of the trip, but in the end, I feel like it centered me better. As it stands, my proposed year book has actually had an increase in development since my return with daily notes and a slightly more optimistic bent that this can actually happen. I do not know that my creativity is up, but I am centered back to at least thinking in that way. I am happy about that.

Now to get back to my thoughts on the actual trip. Do I feel like I benefited at all from the experience? For the most part, yes. I went over with little intention besides seeing Alex, and that was far surpassed. I rode public transportation, went to a burlesque show, and enjoyed the wonders of contemporary British culture.

Mind you, I must warn you that a quick search of Threesome via Google is a little bit pornographic. So instead of leading everyone astray, I figured that this photo will at least give you an idea of what it looks like. I must admit that I am not entirely sure why that is the show of everything (Friday Night Dinner, Pete vs. Life, Black Books, Fresh Meat) that I clung to most, but I really dig it and have only a few gaps to fill before I have seen the entire series. At very least, I must say that I enjoy having the stereotype of British sitcoms broken by actually proven that there is more than Rowan Atkinson in World War II garb. I know that there is plenty of modern UK humor out there, but I don't see a lot of it because it just isn't commercial enough. Also, Russell Howard is pretty funny.

I know, I am spending way too much time on the pop culture side of things, but that is essentially what I hoped to get out of it. In reality, I got so much more. So instead of throwing snippets about, I figured that I would try and get it out of my system before continuing. I also apologize for not throwing in actual photographs, but you know what, I have posted what I have and you can visit them on their own respective pages.

At first, I was very much overwhelmed by the change of culture. The first few days weren't so much appreciation as they were just trying to convince myself that I was in England. Even the trips to the pubs were met with me in disbelief that the fireplaces were made with real bricks. It just blew my mind. Somehow the accents were the least of my worries for awhile. However, by the end, I kind of felt like the nuances were getting to me. I almost felt like I had stayed long enough to replace most dialogue with "fucking hell." Quite a bit edgier than "bloody" if you ask me. 

I feel like being overwhelmed ruined the first five days. Not that these days weren't packed with memories. In fact, a lot of the basis of those days were fun filled. We went up to the top of the town's church, and I went into the Odeon in Brighton to see Gangster Squad. There was plenty worth admiring about the early days. However, around the following Monday, I felt like things clicked and I at very least was ready to do anything.

Of course, the introduction of snow was quite a hurdle, but at very least, I felt like I finally understood what being debilitated meant. I have had my own car for years now, so reliance on transportation hasn't been an issue. I argue that I at least spent 20 hours sitting on a train and waiting for the destination. I got so used to staring out the window that it was probably the most missed thing when I got back home. Also, watching BBC and discovering just how snow affected the country made me realize just how impacted that Viv's job was because of the conditions and how limited our time was. At very least, I felt like it gave us time to finally enjoy the world around us. With a car, there would be limitless places to go. With the snow blocking the train, we had no excuse but to walk around town.

I never got used to the currency and I only really drank once on the whole trip. Also, part of me feels guilt for being so excessive. However, the definition of excessive over there is quite different. For the most part, I also felt like maybe I was dehydrated (or constipated) most times because on average, the portions of drinks were smaller and only really were served at a rate of one every few hours. I had to savor liquids, and that is something I'm terrible at. I could handle the food, but liquids are not something I miss having little of. However, I do admit that another cultural difference is that England doesn't feel at all excessive. Even going to the bathroom at work seems to be more excessive here. 

I don't know that I learned too much that was culture shock in reality. The people were almost too mellow. Even the people I encountered who were shady didn't really come across as threatening as people from America. They had their quirks, but as long as I stayed my distance, I didn't feel like my life was in danger. I cannot find too much to complain about. They were efficient without being bossy and there was a sense of optimism that I feel is lacking here. Also, I just love not hearing about football every week. Coming to England really let me not hear about football. Also, the slang is less egregious, though more entertainingly fake.

I also feel like I know what cold weather is. I read on Facebook people complaining about weather, and all I could say was "I am walking in 0 degree weather. Ze-Ro." I used to feel smutty wearing a jacket, but it kind of made sense. I am trying to take weather more seriously now and not wear coats or turn on air conditioning just because it is a bit nippy. I actually can walk outside and despite a chill, it won't affect me as much as it would in England. I almost feel lucky to not have to worry about that.

I know that I am not saying a lot about Alex or the company, but that is because I have said most of the things that I wanted to about them in the past few entries. I had a lot of fun and you could give me three months, and I would still feel like it was short. At worst, I would complain about how stuffy the houses are after awhile (since the houses are older, air vents aren't installed in every room) and that yes, those accents may have bugged me. I don't exactly come from a place of authentic accents, but somehow there's an auditory element to home sickness.

In closing, I feel like I just learned to appreciate life more. I have kind of adapted that mindset over the past few years, but not in as rapid a way as I did during these two weeks. I am just hoping that I use it for motivation and not just slouch into nothingness. I need to make 2013 the year of accomplishments, and getting into the mindset is already a good start. Hey, I already found just where appreciation for burlesque fits. 

Also, I feel like the lasting souvenir that Alex gave me was a bruise on my right shoulder. It took me a few days to realize that it was there. It still is fading after a week, but I kind of look at it as a reminder of just how fun the trip was. True, it was not exactly the longest lasting or most positive thing he could give me, but I feel that it was the symbolism more than anything that makes the bruise matter.

So, this is it for Region 2 Diaries. I want to thank everyone who helped fund the trip, motivated me with advice, or just read what I had to say. I know that I probably gave more love to Operation Kino and Anne Marsen here, but do know that coming home to you guys was an equal part of my sanity as much as seeing the Wattses. I know that things didn't work out and I couldn't see Freya, but do know I send her a hello. I am hoping to make another, shorter trip out next year for her wedding, if just for an excuse to be out there. Hopefully by then, I will be living my personal goals instead of just saying them.

With this established, this may not be the end of Region 2 Diaries. In fact, it may be defunct for now, but please be aware. This is a blog dedicated to everything involving me and Alex. When we get together next, I will attempt to relaunch this with daily entries and multimedia again. Hopefully with less paranoia, but you never know. The possibilities of places to go are endless. Other dream trips? Canada and New York. Don't know why, but those two masses of land have fascinated me for awhile now. 

Thanks for reading, and I will see you when I try to launch this again. Don't know where, don't know when.

Day 13-14 (Jan. 25-26): Where all the Wight Women At?

ANSWER 1: Oliver from Harvard and Jennifer at Radcliffe survive every obstacle except mortality in this best seller.

ANSWER 2: This Skakespearean tragedy, one of his last, is based on Plutarch's Lives.

-Day Thirteen-

For starters, I am well aware that this is more than a few days late. I hope that through the last stretch of entries, I will be able to tell you simply that I was very busy without having to blatantly say that. Also, day thirteen was pretty much a slog. How much of a slog was it? 

I figured that I would explain myself in regards to the last entry. When I said that day 12 was the worst day of the trip, I stand by it. However, if the worst that this gets is riding trains for hours on end and arriving late at night to watch white rappers on music video channels, then I am having a really solid trip. However, because only one day can be the best, alas one day has to be the worst. It has to lack something that the others have. Activity is the one thing that comes to mind. It was predominantly travel. No fuss, no muss. It wasn't that I got stranded in Cornhead and had to call Viv for a ride home. It is simply that when I compile memories for the trip, I take the least from day twelve. So while the terms worst may be deemed as too much of a problematic wording, it really was just a day aboard the train.

Anyways, on to day thirteen. this isn't really a day for me. I wake up and Alex informs me that he needs to help Natalie at her work place: Cancer Research, which is a thrift shop of sorts with the intention of donating profits to cancer research. The place didn't have wi-fi, so Alex dumped me at a cafe down the street with a computer, thus where I wrote my last entry and felt the need to watch the Inside Llewellyn Davis trailer on repeat. I didn't.

However, I had this really awesome cheese potato that came with a side of salad. Since I was on a sofa, I had to juggle the computer and potato quite often, but damn, I really miss having cheese in potatoes. One of my regrets is not having more potato/cheese combos.

The rest of the stay wasn't that eventful. I pretty much took time to blast Facebook with more nonsensical posts about the Grammys (Jack White and the Black Keys for Best Album!), and how much I dislike talking about keeping Star Wars alive. Unfortunately, nobody was up at the time, so I rarely got replies and my one true moment to sit around and talk to people kind of jeopardized itself. 

To say the least, I also had a weird period during that time where I read Pajiba's review of Movie 43, which I figured would be awful. However, you kind of hope with so many Oscar winners and favorite up and comers that there would be some redemption. The review wasn't so much "this sucks," but a list detailing the graphic humor. I will not dare waste your time mentioning it, as I feel that just knowing about it put me into a deep depression until Alex showed up. I mean, it probably isn't as graphic as imagining it is, but the fact that it was committed to celluloid is just terrible. Also, I really feel bad for Chris Pratt, who has been on a roll in the past few years and I almost feel like half-jokingly writing a piece that this will corrupt Hugh Jackman's Oscar chances (but I am pro-Joaquin Phoenix till the end). And on a final note, I know it is January and a lot of crap comes out in January, but it sincerely made me feel terrible to be an American and have it associated with my country. For some reason, bad comedies really piss me off more than bad-any other genre. This easily sounds like one of the worst.

Anyways, that is how much of a slog my day was. I was able to write up a storm and still find time to get bummed out that America released a really shitty movie. On the bright side, I cannot be blamed for either that film of Hansel and Gretel: Vampire Hunters success at the box office last weekend because, ahem, I was on a plane. I am still loathing the moment that I click on the box office and see if anything embarrassing has happened while I was gone. I sincerely miss keeping up with stats.

Back at Natalie's house in the evening, I am not entirely sure what we did. I know that we watched two whole episodes of the Simpsons, two halves (thanks to a poorly programmed recording), and it was a relief. I seriously watch that show every day and it has been a little hard during the trip not having access to it on a regular basis. I don't know if Alex quite enjoyed the episodes as much as I did, but I still find reason to admire it.

That's it. That's all. That's all there is. Told you, it wasn't much of a day. Everyone is getting ready for the burlesque show tomorrow and I am just trying to make sure that I don't get into their hairs. 

-Day Fourteen-

After talking with Alex, I understand that my involvement with the show is kind of crucial. No, I was not performing, but after a string of paranoia of people either dropping out or missing a few key elements, this was the big day. It was time to put our nose to the grindstone and just make the best of this task, and don't ask why. Since we were making posters on the cheap, I was in charge of cutting up cardboard boxes into specific shapes while Alex cut them into frames and Natalie did some calls to make sure the world was arranged correctly for tonight.

After a lunch while watching soccer, I was no longer needed. They dumped me in Natalie's bedroom, where I continued my quest to finish off Threesome before the trip ended. On a spoiler note: I wasn't successful, but only by three episodes. I must say that I really enjoy the show and I found one episode with Bill Bailey to be rather odd in that it was like a hostage parody set in a mall with two babies. It was pretty great. Nothing is quite up to the level of Peep Show, but Jez does get around and I am just glad to know that England has modern contemporaries instead of being "Oh, you're that country that produced Monty Python," 

We left in the early afternoon to start setting up the event. Now, I had no idea what to expect. Truthfully, every time I hear about a show, I imagine an auditorium set up. There's a stage up front and the seats lined for the remaining space. Nope. This was just an empty room and it was up to a crew of about seven (don't quote me on that) to get everything in order. 

However, what a crew. They got the stage worked out and the lighting and sound. These guys were great at working fast and efficient. I was in charge of helping to line up tables and make sure that there was enough chairs. We had to stop by at the nearby supermarket store Morrison's for some important items, but otherwise, we were looking great with some time until the crowd started pouring in.

It made me nostalgic for when I was younger, going as far back as high school. I always felt odd not doing stuff at these events. I cannot go to a carnival without the feeling of "can I help you?" I just enjoy the labor behind setting up gigs, notably smaller ones that require limited people to make something happen. You have to be self-determined and it is one of those few times that I feel that you actually get to know people's work ethics. While I plan to retire and move into writing soon, I still enjoy helping set stuff up, if just because the reward of the evening being a success only feels that much more earned.

After a quick stop at McDonalds for dinner (we were one of about four parties that went there during the evening), I was relieved of duty. I now could do whatever I want, which you must admit is awkward in a place where you know no one and you kind of feel like even moving a chair can be done. However, the place looked great, and if I find a good shot, I'll throw it your way (since majority of the shots were of the stage, there isn't too much audience shots). Even if I didn't enjoy burlesque, I had that sensation of positivity already that this place looks good, and it is all because of teamwork. In fact, I argue that it would have been harder for me to be friendlier if I just showed up at the last minute. These are solid people, I must say.

I sat towards the back by the cameraman. I pretty much wouldn't feel right sitting at a table, even if I helped to decorate it. Before I go any further, let me establish preconceived notions. I don't go out to erotic events. It just isn't what I do. Now I know that burlesque isn't exactly stripping, but the provocative factor does detriment my enthusiasm. I mean, I am very proud of the effort put into getting tonight together, but before I saw anything, it seemed kitschy and dumb. I do not say this to offend anyone who put on the event. Seeing the effort into how the show came together more than elevates my opinion to a place of respect.

With that said, I must admit that I was not really into the idea that cabaret-style music dominated the show. I figured that was my initial reasoning for why I presumed it was kitschy. The performance began and the first few performers got me thinking... this is kind of silly. All they do is slowly take their clothes off in similar fashion. It felt like watching gif images on a loop for the first 15 minutes. Of course, I will remain from mentioning who to spare hurt feelings, but it was more because their routines were just not that inspired.

Cut to about the fifth one in and suddenly it is starting to make more sense. Sure, it is about removing clothes, but there is more to it. While I do think that gratuitous glove removal is a little overdone, the performers all got more and more interesting. They had outfits and props and suddenly their performance became entertainment. It wasn't so much about the arrival, but how they got there. I began to see it as an erotic equivalence to a well constructed paragraph that teases you until... BAM! You have reached the end/shocking reveal or twist. While some paragraphs are just average, a really good one will make you feel great.

Will I go see burlesque again? Probably not on my own, but I definitely don't entirely knock it anymore. It is a performance piece and while the punchline is way more obvious than a comic or dance, there is an art to a well constructed piece. I admit some were just plain goofy, but there is a mix of confidence and creativity that drives it to a place that somehow works. I will admit that I still don't get the cat calls during the performance, as it dampened the final hurrah when the performance was done, but I suppose it works.

There was a lady playing accordion, and either I was just out of it, or I thought it went on too long. She tried to be morbid and sly, and I felt like it lacked rhythm. That was my big concern. The music just didn't flow well nor did the lyrical construct hit me right. People liked it, but by that point the bar had been opened for an hour and who knows what who thought of blah. I am impressed with the crowd, though, as 70+ people showed up when the concern was that we wouldn't even break even. I really feel like Alex and Natalie are very good at driving an event, and somehow that is the most pride that I take from the trip, that I finally have seen Alex do something public and creative, and it was a success.

During intermission, Alex bought me a Jack and Coke. Being a dumbass, his next move was to make me count out 19 raffle tickets for a customer. They kept sticking together and I had to count five times just to come up with the same number twice. It was so hard and I felt embarrassed afterwards that I had to count 19 tickets in such a sloppy fashion. 

My last comments on the show will be about Alex the stand up. I was wondering what his routine would be. I assumed that he would get a tie going and tell it to me ahead of time in a very blunt fashion. However, he had been telling me the jokes all along. I just didn't realize that they were in fractions. I knew 80% of his set, so I just sat back and tried to see how the audience ate it up. Rather solid, speaking that by that point I began to wonder if I even found those jokes funny. Not because they were dated, but he has said some up to 15 times in the past few weeks.

Probably the most crucial thing is that I feel he has stage presence. He isn't necessarily all there just yet, but he controls the crowd and knows how to go with the flow. He has charisma and that alone will sell the lesser jokes. Maybe you'll see the performance later on. I feel that he is still very raw, but he is on his way to being one hell of an MC/comedian if he chooses to continue. I cannot really compare accurately, but leading up to this, there has been a whole ton of talk of Aziz Ansari's "Dangerously Delicious," which I feel definitely inspired him. 

I know that I am just brushing over Alex here, but I think that he has charisma and can ad lib pretty well. I say that sincerely. Was he perfect? No. He still is raw and sometimes succeeds more on passion than craft. However, the delivery and overall performance shows someone who at least has something to say and an interesting way of going about it. 

In an odd way, I kind of want to watch Funny People again now. In all honesty, as much as I am a devout Apatowian, I skipped This Is 40 because it just didn't look good. I feel bad, but when push came to shove and every movie was three hours, I just decided against it. I will definitely make it a priority DVD rental when it comes out. However, I also say that because I almost feel like Alex and I discovered Ansari together through that movie, and to know we both still find him great is both an achievement for him as well as us.

After tearing down and attempting to get me drunk, we left. Here's the truth. I intended to get drunk, but Alex couldn't afford to go over to the bar enough to get me drinks. I didn't get a hand stamp, so I assumed they wouldn't sell to me. Still, I drank quite a bit, but by the fact that I moved over 70 chairs into a pile along the wall perfectly is only a testament to the idea that I haven't been drunk in over two years. Woo hoo? I really wanted to make drinking special and only do it in Alex's company. It kind of failed.

Alex still had stuff to do, so he sent me home with the cameraman and the sound guy. Also, along came Violet, who was a winner of Burlesque Idol in 2012. I didn't know who was sitting in the back seat, so I initially took to where I normally sit. The sound guy cut me off and said he had a problem sitting up front. I took to the front, even though I don't necessarily enjoy it. Part of me contemplates if the sound guy haggled me out of a seat to sit next to the winner of Burlesque Idol in 2012. I almost feel that is the case, though taking his modesty into account, he may have had a slight problem.

It was very odd driving home in a car full of people I hardly knew and before leaving talked to for 20 minutes. It did feel like one of those odd Hunter S. Thompson stories where you join midway through and suddenly you're with a bunch of random strangers driving to nowhere. The countryside was long and winding and thus Violet complained for most of the ride. Not knowing the island, I had no idea where we were going, so that added to my confusion. Still, I found it funny that Violet, who is from London, complained about most of the trip because she is not used to the lack of street lights. However, at a certain point, I too was feeling like we were on our way to a brothel.

But we got home safely and that trip is just one of those amazing yet odd stories that I will take with me. Since Alex wasn't home, I just took to my room. Out of boredom, I popped on the Atonement score and initially bummed myself out. It was really good and I was beginning to realize that the trip was almost over. Also, it was almost 1:30 AM, so I didn't exactly go to bed on time. I eventually decided to say "fuck it" and began putting on dance music. Alex walked in while I was busting a move to Outkast. Somehow I got under the covers in time, but the sweaty body and heavy breath probably gave it away. 

Since I didn't really have much internet access, I cannot really share too much news other than Ellen Page is in the next X-Men movie. Not looking forward to that. I seriously don't get the X-Men. They have all the powers they need to survive. Where is the conflict? However, this will get me to watch the movie and force me to watch X-Men: The Last Stand just so I can get a double dose of X-Men Page. It does seem utterly odd that that I am gone for two weeks and suddenly Ellen Page has had more news coverage than she had in most of late 2012. 

Going to bed around 3 AM, I knew that it was going to be the last full day together, and we had to make the most of it. Coming up next... we pull an all nighter! Kind of.

QUESTION 1: What is Love Story? 

QUESTION 2: What is Antony and Cleopatra?

Day 12 (Jan. 24): Enter Natalie, Stage Right

ANSWER: Post-medieval ballads about this outlaw are the source for his companion Marian.

-Day Twelve-

Here's the unfortunate truth, if you had to chalk up anything out of today, it may be that it was the worst day of the trip. Okay, maybe the least eventful, but it was heavily because of travel. We didn't sit around doing anything fun. We were in perpetual motion. What makes it the worst is not necessarily that I don't travel a lot, but because there is no novelty. There isn't much in terms of introductory material. All it was really was a whole ton of travelling.

There isn't too much that I can share about the pre-leaving stuff besides that I packed a bag, read my Alan Sepinwall book, and waited until we left for the train. That is really the extent to my day before 3 PM. After that, it was pretty much time for us to catch the train. A bunch of school children made sure that the train was jam packed. I thought ahead and packed on a bunch of podcasts, notably the Auteurcast episodes on Panic Room and Zodiac as well as a Fresh Air interview with Lena Dunham. Halfway through that conversation, I found myself returning to that lost 20-something mindset and thinking that she was a genius. Her dialogue is just so fresh and I envy her. I want to be a contributing voice to this generation in history, but I just need to keep going.

Also, I am not telling anyone around here, mostly because of semantics, but my plan when I first get home is rather simple. Either I fall asleep, go out and have dinner and talk about my trip. Maybe hug the cat. However the first thing that I will do when everyone leaves me alone is marathon the three episodes of Girls from season two that has aired so far. Listening to that Fresh Air interview has gotten me convinced that I am missing something great. As it stands, reading online that this may be better than season one is unbelievable, because that was flawless (okay, not flawless, but you get my drift). How can they possibly top it? THAT is what I plan to do once the world leaves me alone. Sit on my bed and just watch 90 minutes of Girls. Also, I have gone the longest IN MY LIFE without watching the Simpsons. It is unnerving, really. 

If one person I feel bad for on the trip, it is Alex. Here's the thing. Since we are staying at Natalie's house, and it will be crowded, he had to bring a duvet (or a big bag with bed stuff), which in my brief time carrying it was pretty heavy. I felt bad for him and my shoulder bag-esque stuff for the few nights there pales in comparison. Also consider the compacted train, it was a tight squeeze at times and it was a pain for him to walk through the aisles. My sympathies go out to him, though he is doing all right. 

To give you an idea of the amount of time that we took public transportation, it went like this: a 90 minute train ride connected to a 60 minute train ride connected to a 20 minute train ride connected to a 20 minute boat ride to another 20 minute train ride. For anyone doubting that podcasts are the future, you must download a few and go on a super long train ride. Your sanity will thank you. 

Still, nothing eventful for most of that ride. Nothing really worth reporting about. We met Natalie in Portsmouth for the boat ride. Instead of sharing the long, dull next hour of transportation, I will just dive into a rambling on Alex. 

I am aware that Alex has had girlfriends. I have talked to a few of them and they seem like decent people. However, this may be the first one that I have met. True, Alex did date Alex B., though I question if I should count that since Alex B. and I had a developed relationship before they briefly hooked up. Anyways, I am just going to say that this is the first girlfriend that I have met of Alex's that I knew very little about. I was hoping things would go smoothly, or the next three days would be a real pain.

From what vague interaction I had with her on the rides over, she seems like a good girl. However, I must champion Alex's character. I get the sense that he cares for her just with the little things. He helps her at work and they seem to be partners in menial tasks. I get the sense that he cares and in many ways, it makes me wonder when I will actually feel like I care about someone. It sucks to think this way, but I have been alone, mostly connecting with people on an impersonal level and hoping good behavior attracts them. I am not saying my life is total abyss, but I have trouble finding someone that I want to care about. I suppose that I apply to the 1 close friend than 100 impersonal friends policy. Excuses, excuses. 

But Natalie seems nice and I cannot really find too many faults. They both seem to be responsible adults and together they make a reasonable couple. I'll stop talking, but I guess I just approve. After a dinner where I got to meet the parents, we went into her room for the next few hours and watched TV. 

We mostly flipped through music video channels. I got a crash course introduction to the pop bands of their 90's with the likes of Blue and Five. They had a bunch of stories about who was cool and who was a dick. Somehow one of the few songs that we listened to all the way through was "It's Raining Men." However, the biggest deal for me was that I finally saw the video for Ray Parker Jr.'s "Ghostbusters," which lead me to be like "What is Al Franken doing in this video?" It was quite a trip, though I still have no idea why this video had John Candy and Chevy Chase cameos (the latter of whom appeared twice). Natalie has no idea who they were, but my love of SNL cannot keep me from noticing them. 

Then we watched AKA, a channel dedicated to user submitted rap videos. Now,  I want to say upfront that while I find modern American rap to be ridiculously shallow, there is some sincerity to it that keeps it from being hilarious. Cut to British rap, notably this white guy named Devlin. He has no real flow and his baddassery was not quite that great. While I am not going to argue that England doesn't have any hoods, I doubt they compare to Detroit. Devlin was exceptionally awkward, as he had the passion, but his lyrics were just ridiculous and I had no belief that he was exactly legitimately good. There was even a video where they had screens of him performing over England's biggest monuments and it looked totally hoaky. When he said "You're being brainwashed," I couldn't help but laugh.

There was also another video. I had no idea who the artist was, but the song was "Grown Ass Man" and it only was a great punchline because the video was totally absurd. The guy was rapping about being mature and responsible, but he was doing it on a swing, in a bumper car, and for some reason flashing a Toy Story 3 Ken Doll. Also, the characters had Lego heads for no real reason. Again, lyrics were not that impressive and for once, I felt like America did something better, notably proven when Eminem's "Lose Yourself" came on. 

Before I totally write off rap music from the UK, let me note that I am wondering how things got here. I thoroughly enjoyed Lady Sovereign's "Public Warning" album, and I argue that there are definitely a few really solid other artists. For instance, the artist that I somehow consider to be the pioneer (or at very least, the first notable UK rap artist in America) is Mike Skinner aka The Streets. I consider him to be an acquire taste rhythmically, but I did enjoy songs off of his first three albums. I figured it was a good sign of England doing the genre, but without appearing to be just a clone. Also, Dizzee Rascal, who was prominently featured at the Olympics, is one that I haven't quite gotten into, but another notable name. In fact, it has been seven years since I sincerely can think of solid UK rap artists. Someone solve this so I don't think that Devlin is the only thing you guys have produced.

We also watched this show that was essentially cinematic auctions. They found antiques from movies and auctioned them off to bidders. Where it was initially chosen because Alex was into the Star Trek stuff, I got on board when I noticed a sleestak was involved. I don't know if Alex actually watched Land of the Lost, but damn, was that an exciting moment for me. I have an odd love with that show in that I will watch it if it is on, but I probably will not buy the box set. Then there was... drum roll... the Invisible Man poster, which is a really old and really rare version. I must enjoy the irony that this has now been referenced during 80% of my stay, and this time in a very, very blatant way.

It ran for $200,000, and Alex was concerned that nobody should play that much for a piece of paper. But let us note, that first off, this film is a classic of the era and that poster is gorgeous. The James Whale film with Claude Rains. Look it up. That poster is gorgeous. Alex calls that film crap, but I wonder if he is thinking of the same one that they were actually referencing. As much as I dislike the Antiques Roadshow shows, I really was into that auction for the Invisible Man poster. It is just... so... gorgeous. 

This was pretty much the rest of the night until around midnight, when we finally called it quits and I retreated to my room, which was a nice combo of a mattress on the floor with the walls being lined with dolls and figurines that definitely screamed a good hearted woman. I couldn't quite get to sleep right away, so I decided to watch Girl Walk // All Day, and I sincerely feel the warmth in that movie now. The ending is so beautiful, which is odd since I initially found it overwhelming. However, I still argue that there is gay subtext, even though it is mostly because the romance feels like it goes from being between the Girl and the Gentleman to the Gentleman and the Creep. Of course, narration goes out the window in the last 10 minutes, but dammit, I wish that the video lasted three hours. I kind of love it too much to make it to the end.

I am not even sure anymore, and I pray that this isn't just a fad. I love that film and wonder if I'll burn out on it, or if I will actually learn to embrace it as one of my all time favorites. It is entering Juno territory now with how often I have seen it: four times straight through, at least 20 not connected. In a sense, it is almost too simple of a story to really explain why it hits me so emotionally, but it is just so thrilling that I cannot stop watching it. Also, the camera work just impresses me every time. 

I'll stop with that for now. As it is, I am currently on my own in the Isle of Wight for a brief period. Why is this? Alex is helping Natalie at her shop and I would just be a nuisance there. Killing time at a cafe called Bagel Wrap. Not much really to report other than it is giving me plenty of personal time to catch up on movie news and just check  my mail. I am hoping that next week I will be able to jump on a chance to review Quentin Dupieaux's Wrong. I have been looking forward to that movie FOREVER. Also, please do yourself a favor and watch the Inside Llewellyn Davis trailer. It really justifies why I love the Coen Brothers. 

No Sundance news, and I cannot really say hello to family, as it is probably pitch black where they are. All I can do is enjoy my time with a computer. It has been a fun trip and I don't want to see it end, but at the same time, the two weeks have really shown themselves and I feel that I am almost too comfortable being abroad to the point of disbelief. This may sound redundant, sure, but I cannot believe how calming it is to be here. True, I miss the basic needs, but it is not like an internment camp. I will survive, and I have nicely. 

Tomorrow should be interesting. I have strayed from really saying it, but Natalie is putting on a burlesque gig and Alex is doing stand-up. I am hoping to enjoy it, but also concerned that somehow I will get awkwardly emotional. Provocative stuff is not really something I partake in all that much. I'm acting like this is life changing, but seriously, for someone who has trouble finding anyone appealing enough to talk to, I just wonder how things will go. Again, I will survive, but part of me feels like I will break into a "I'm more interested in how you did that" mindset. Fuck my intellect brain.

Anyways, having fun. Will continue to have fun. No need to worry about me. However, you will not stop me from naming tomorrow's entry "Where all the Wight women at?" I have seriously been keeping that in reserves since I heard about this place. 


QUESTION: Who is Robin Hood?

Day 6 (Jan. 18): Supermarket Fantasy

ANSWER: Often called the race of truth, it can be for the whole team or just one cyclist against the clock.

-Day Six-

As it has been established, I fell asleep very hard at 8 pm last night. I  have  no idea what happened in the last conscious 10 minutes of my night, but when I woke up, I had an odd daze where I looked around the room, almost forgetting that I had taken up space in Alex's. It was only made more trippy because he had on a red lava lamp that seemed to accentuate the room in an eerie, humdrum fashion that almost made me feel like his room was exotic. Since I didn't care to figure out where the light switch was, I just accepted that the light would be this way for the remainder of my stay.

However, an 8-5 sleep is pretty impressive, and I got enough sleep. Enough to the point where I realized that getting back to sleep was impossible. Of course, things were only made more interesting by the fact that my iPod was charging in the other room, which was currently procured by the other guest, Bill. It would make no sense to go down there and grab the music player without seeming somewhat voyeuristic. 

I was left with my phone, and since it got connection to the internet, I tried to use it diligently, but ended up going overboard. Reading was no longer satisfying me, so I decided to start watching videos. Of course, the most enjoyable part was when I discovered that the Hives did a video for "Abra Cadaver." It was an old school throwback to horror films, and for all the ingenuity that was put into it, my favorite part was when the guitarist just slid across the floor as if on a moving device. Millions of videos do that, but as usual, I seem to admire the little things.

After a little Girl Walk // All Day and catching up with everyone back home, I noticed that my phone was wiped. I was also going mad, as I was now up in the room for two hours with very little to do. It was getting closer to a reasonable hour, so I decided to take a shower. It oddly featured a couple turns of the door knob from outside, but even that wasn't enough. When I got out and downstairs, it was almost 8 and everyone was still asleep. I didn't feel like going back up the stairs, so I just walked around looking at stuff in their house. I didn't fondle anything, but with an indefinite amount of free time, I could justify looking at every picture with a fine eye.

I eventually gave up and sat on the couch where I petted the cat and waited for the world to wake up. Chris was the first one up and about, and after mistaking me for Alex through a conversation in the dark, he revealed that we were having a cooked breakfast. Sausage, eggs, beans, and pancakes. It was quite good and also kind of a relief to have the world waking up. I don't understand how people can have problems sleeping if there is nothing to do at 5 AM. It was a trip that I had been up four hours before everyone came down complaining about sleep. In fact, this trip is odd solely because I rarely go to bed before midnight and now I have seemed to make a routine out of it.

We started the day off simple by watching some videos that Chris found online. I think it was from the Annex or something. He first showed me a video of this Australian group called Axis of Awesome that took every song written on four chords and made a medley out of it. It was pretty impressive. We also watched a video of this guy miming to Natalie Imbruglia's "Torn," which was only made better by the man's facial expressions throughout the entire event. It also got to discussion of other comedians that I will be introduced over the remainder of my stay. I  have no idea what they're called, so I apologize.

I also discovered that through the back door of the house, a cat came in. Not the two that live here, but just one with a bushy tail that was intensely adorable. It was almost heartbreaking to part with it as the snow came down and we had to get a move on. It also got me thinking about how different cats are in the states. I am not saying that all are like this, but animals tend to be very defensive where I am from. They won't let just anyone near them unless they sense that you are harmless. So far, I haven't met a cat that just walked up to me and wanted attention. I first noticed it last time when pigeons refused to fly away when I got close. No matter how much I chased them, they were more contempt with walking near me than flying off from yards away.

We were eventually on our way to Kent to do some grocery shopping. Being from Long Beach, I still am finding it revolutionizing that people can drive great distances without a stop light. It was the same in Arizona. Sure, you had stop signs, but for an extensive drive, there was only one light. I know that it was the country side essentially, but it was weird that it was just a long, winding road that seemed to be fortressed with trees. I also discovered that Paul McCartney and Johnny Depp have homes in the general vicinity and Rod Stewart used to own one a long time ago. 

Also, just to contrast cultures, I have heard a story about Depp a few times. For Halloween, he went incognito as a postal worker. The next day, everyone commented about how the new postman looks an awful lot like Johnny Depp. That is way more entertaining than hearing that people stopped him and questioned who he was. which feels very American, or just Californian.

Once we got to Kent, more interesting things came up. They have limited parking in their supermarket parking lot. This is made noticeable by security cameras that record the moment you arrive and then it is up to you to get out of there within two hours. Maybe it is the extensive amount of time in grocery stores, but it made me think that we basically were going to go straight there and spend 40+ minutes looking at stuff. I am not that way, but I feel like stereotyping customers, especially since we were buying a lot of stuff.

But we went to the nearby shopping area where Alex and I split up from the group, which also featured Chris, Viv, and our driver for the day, Bill. It was pretty much a day to try and catch up on the loose ends of my presents list to family. I won't spoil if anything was bought, but I did see a lot of interesting stuff that could possibly be coming home with me. Also, we stopped in at a local book store where I learned a few things. Alex is way into choose your own adventure books, he thinks that there will be another Scott Pilgrim series (as a consistent follower of Bryan Lee O'Malley, I am still challenging him to prove it), that there is a novel adaptation of Dawn of the Dead, and I have not read any Kurt Vonnegut. In a way, I felt like a bad person with that last one. 

Plenty of interesting shops were visited and I even got a picture inside a phone booth for good measure. However, by this point, I was finally introduced to snow. I haven't seen snow since I was a young kid, so this was quite a treat. Also, the only places that I really get cold are in the cheeks, nose, and hands. A hood combated most of it, but the hands were still an issue. I brought it up with Viv when I next ran into her. She oddly had a pair on her, so she gave them to me. Somehow, all of this weather gear feels strange, as in California, it feels excessive. But here, I cannot imagine time with out it.

After Alex finished a really flat strawberry soda that he called a liquor, we headed over to the supermarket, which was called Tesco. I was excited to see what the interior looked like. Outside, it was practically the same layout, save for an elaborate area to put carts that featured a large overhead. I get that it probably has to do with the weather, but it still blew my mind how inconspicuous it tried to look.

Inside, it immediately reminded me of Wal Mart. it  had a very warehouse feel to it. However, that is just because the ceiling and lighting have this aura that makes it feel like everything was shoved in there as opposed to properly placed. The layout isn't too impressively different and not worth going into detail about. The aisles are longer and don't split down the center, which is the only significant difference. Alex even showed me the area where they had DVDs on discount, which wasn't all that impressive, though makes you wonder about his sanity when he calls the Paul Verhoven Total Recall really bad and Wrath of the Titans anything but unnecessary. I am not even calling that cultural differences. I am just saying that the 90's Total Recall in his algorithm is improperly placed and should never be below Wrath of the Titans in any spectrum.

The checkout lines were the more impressive. I let Viv take care of the grunt work and I just stood and looked over the entire store's layout. For starters, I hadn't heard an intercom request assistance for anything. People bagged their own groceries in plastic bags (though they were being advertised as reusable), and most impressively, the cashiers actually had chairs to sit on.

If you want to hear people bitch about the grocery business, just talk about the chairs at the check stand. That is a very personal subject. We don't have it in the states no matter where I go. However, 100's of hours of being a bagger has given me time to listen to people complain about their feet/back hurting. Yet they cannot have chairs because the customers would find that they are lazy and other complex reasons like that. I am not saying that chairs for the entire duration is the goal, but as a bagger, who has had to be on his feet for eight hour shifts, I am aware that the human body isn't always prone to being pristine after moving around in very limited quarters. The checkers more-so, as they are not allowed to leave their check stand lest they are doing floor work, and in most cases, nobody is allowed to do that before five.

So the chairs is a revolutionary idea. I get where the complexity would come from, speaking as the baggers would be heavily handicapped by not having chairs, but the checkers are a different story. I sympathize with the desire for them to just rest their feet once in awhile, and sometimes breaks are not enough. I am not about to start a revolution, but for those that really want to know, chairs are the most ground breaking aspect of my visit.

Also, as I left, I noticed that the Tesco sign had open hours posted by the entrance. That is also quite something, as it is Monday through Saturday 8 AM to 10 PM and on Sundays 10 PM to 4 PM. I admit that convenience for us would be sacrificed in that, but being open 6 AM to 11 PM just really, really, really makes you jealous. I am not saying that the overall service of the trip is superior, but it felt like they were somewhat successful in creating an apt working environment. I suppose the only issue is that employees would be complaining about the need for more hours. 

Back at the house, I finally got to see what a ground covered in snow looked like. If the place wasn't very rural and had cars going every which way, I would be happy to just get down and snow angel everything. As it stands, I am so tempted just to spend the snowed in time walking around Rye to see what a city covered in white looks like. For a boy from Southern California, this is somehow also revolutionary.

It is odd that in my stay, I have found the simple things more exciting than the buildings and landscapes. The stone beaches, the chairs, the snow. You don't get those where I'm from. It almost feels novelty. I also talked to Viv, who was concerned that the trip wasn't meeting my standards. I pretty much have stated many times, many ways that I just got on the plane and that was the end of my plans. I just wanted to see Alex and do something fun with him. So far, I would say that it is going great. I also find it weird that when we do go touristy, I end up being overwhelmed and tired. However, when I see snow outside my window, I am thrilled. Go figure. Hopefully it doesn't hold up seeing Django Unchained in the next week somehow.

The night wasn't that much more exciting. We finished off season one of Threesome, and I found one episode exceptionally hilarious. Also, this is mostly in terms of sitcom filming, I was rather impressed with the way one sequence with a merry-go-round was shot that almost seemed to be more artistic than the scene needed to be. Overall, I am just really digging this show and I want to see where it goes.

The night wasn't eventful, as I ended up having dinner and almost crashed immediately. I tried to hold up until 10 PM in order to fix my sleeping routine. However, I made it to 9:30 before I was told by Alex to just go to bed. I decided that it was a great time to catch up on Sundance coverage, which was officially starting that day. I was about to watch Katey Rich and Matt Patches' video log on day one. I had it already to go. Somehow, I ended up falling asleep right as the page was loading. It drained my battery, but gave me plenty to watch this morning. So far, I am now convinced that Crystal Fairy is one of my anticipated films of the year. Michael Cera doing drugs in Chile? Yes please. Also, I have seen shots of Ellen Page there with the Touchy Feely crew and now I am kicking myself because she actually is there. 

Though don't get me wrong, I would regret if I chose that over seeing Alex. True, it does little to forward my career, but I think the time away has done me good. Just finding new things to appreciate is enough to make this trip successful. I think I just needed contrast in my life. I still have no idea what happened when I went to Brighton that made me overwhelmed, but having a slow day after that really put me in my place. 

Side note, expect a review on CinemaBeach from me on A Glimpse Inside the Mind of Charles Swan III. I was expecting to write that up before I left, but I ended up doing it last night all here. Now the question is, did I like the idea of that movie better than Gangster Squad? I am really having trouble determining which of the two is the best film of 2013 so far. I would say that John Dies at the End would be it, but I still consider that a 2012 released based solely on VOD release. Of course, that review may not pop up for awhile, depending on how much more important Sundance coverage is, which I am sure will be more significant for the next week or two. It will be up eventually.

Another slow day, and I promise to try and get the pictures up soon. I am also going to be calling family back home today. We have some interesting developments in the process, so I will be excited to hear about those. Also, I hope to hear from Tiger. I miss that cat. Anyways, I hear breakfast calling my name, and hopefully this is a start to a day where I am not out of sync after a few days of early to rise and early to bed. In fact, I'll leave you with a quote:

"Early to rise and early to bed leaves a man physically rested, but socially dead."

-Yakko (Rob Paulsen) in Animaniacs

QUESTION: What is a time trial?

Day 4 (Jan. 16): Hastings Gonna Haste

ANSWER: This name was shared by English pirates Dampier and Kidd.

-Day Four-

I am just letting you know that I probably will be posting pictures in an additional post today, as I do not have them readily available upon writing this post.

I was about to say that today was the most uneventful one in the stay so far. That is saying something when you consider that yesterday peaked at 2 PM and never quite picked up after that. It was a lot of television after 2 PM, and somehow, I was still willing to call it more eventful than today for the sole reason that it almost seemed like nothing happened. That is, until the sun went down.

Trying to catch up on sleep, I was up late until 4 AM. Tonight's soundtrack seemed to feature a heavy rotation of Pete's Dragon song "Happiest Home in These Hills." Somehow, the black humor and irony of contrasting love with brutality was so adorable at 4 AM. I listened to that song at least six times before I admitted that I was probably tired. Also. I checked out the latest installments of Anne Marsen's video blog called Stargroves Vlog, including the episode about IKEA that made me love her so much more. I am almost convinced that I will psychologically pick a girl who is brunette and adores tabbies. It may not be more than unintentionally subliminal, but I get the impression that it may happen.

Also, I forgot to talk about something that I teased on Facebook. How will I end up on Operation Kino this Friday? They have a lightning round section where they ask for Twitter submitted answers to questions vaguely associated with that week's news. This week was all about what foreign director should make a big Hollywood blockbuster. My main fear is that I posted an hour or two after the post, but I still have that joy in me that I'll be referenced on something eventually, especially since I feel like I have been sneaking onto their radar in the last two months. My answer? Gaspar Noe. I mostly just want to hear if David Ehrlich can do something with that. Of course, Noe is a ridiculous selection just because he has a film called Irreversible, which deals with... ahem, rape.

That was actually from Tuesday, but I felt like I was being mean not to bring it up. Otherwise, the rest of the sleep was uneventful and I woke up around 11. I admit that even in America, I want to be up early so that I at least feel psychologically productive. Good news, that just happened today. Been up since 7 and was listening to the next Analyze Phish episode while getting the room in order (Alex insists that there's a guest that will be using the room for the night).

Alex wasn't too far after. We basically sat around playing an acoustic guitar for awhile. Of course, being in the same room as someone who can play guitar makes me feel inferior. I like what they're playing, but then you pick up the guitar and all you can do is play a really beginner's version of Devo's "Mongoloid." Of course, that song is awesome no matter where you play it. I snuck in some "Freedom of Choice," but that was more because I remember the bass line. Truthfully, I don't know if it is time away from playing, but I cannot play too much bass on a guitar, even if it is just note-note-note.

Alex and Chris got my rail pass stuff taken care of and we were ready to roll by 1 PM. Alex and I went down to the train station to get everything in order. For the most part, no complaints. Just like the DMV in that you get in pay a price, and you're set. Change two weeks to two minutes and you have how I got my rail pass in a nutshell.

Looking at times, we decided to hold off on going to Hastings at that moment. We were going into town to see Gangster Squad, which I jokingly claimed was an odd way of reminding me of what Los Angeles looked like. There wasn't any showing that matched the train and our arrival, so we held off until the evening.

Instead, Alex bitched about wearing shorts in freezing cold weather that also featured a slick patch of ice. He admired the way that I recovered after my foot caught the edge of one. I think my limber nature from bagging all of these years is the one thing that I will take when I quit my job (Side note - don't take this as anything more than "you know I want to quit, so don't look shocked. I won't leave until I find a decent paying writing gig"). But still, that guy wore shorts for the entire time, bitched about it, and then claimed to be too proud to change. Mind you, he had two hours when we got back to the house to fix this, but no... he was too proud to even take advantage of free time to change his pants. He decided that "Abed's Uncontrollable Christmas" was a better call. Hope the irony isn't lost on you.

We caught the trail around five to go to Hastings. See? I told you that the day was uneventful. We practically wasted time in those two hours, and I caught up on some much needed writing. At the train station, we finally got going and Alex assures me that he likes to be incapsulated with much when he is on moving transportation. I sat next to a guy that was playing Against Me! for the entire 20 minute journey. Hope the irony isn't lost on you.

We swiped our cards to leave and suddenly we were in Hastings. Dark outside, and Alex occasinally bitched about wearing shorts and no underwear. I will admit that I felt some odd juxtaposition from the stereotypical England that I felt like Rye was. This place actually felt modern. Alex assures me the place sucks, but I was still in an odd appreciation and suddenly I wanted to see if he'd take me to where Attack the Block was filmed. Of course, I can't stand the risk of mugging, so I never brought it up.

But the place looked decent. However, we didn't even cross the street before Alex decided to take advantage of photo ops (I am officially convinced that me bringing a camera isn't too eventful). He took a photo of a truck that he claims looks like Optimus Prime. Maybe you'll see the photo later, but I still have no idea what he is talking about. He left me at the corner just so he could get a better shot.

When he finally returned, we bought our tickets from the movies and went to have a snack. I am still confused on why my stomach has been oddly empty, full, or congested at odd hours, but I am sure that it is just adjustment. We went into a McDonalds, and it almost felt like going into a familiar place. The crowd had that typical vibe and it was loud as hell. Of course, in an odd fashion, the first thing that I cracked out European money for on this trip was a chicken nugget meal. Truthfully, it was a little dryer than I am used to, but I felt like I needed food.

Alex assures me that the portions are smaller. In fact, I can easily say that the American equivalence to a large is a medium. In a sense, I have tried to eat better/less anyways, so I wasn't too offended. I got a large meal and pretty much was fine after that. However, the one thing that bothered me more than anything is that there are no refills. I have almost curbed bad food habits, but I am a heavy drinker (which may contribute to why I try to steer clear of alcohol on top of other personal reasons) and I tend to overdo it. If you gave me a 2 liter of soda, I'd probably would have drank half in the short time that we were there (though do acknowledge that I am trying to cut down on soda, but this is just for comparison in terms of my thirst).

An odd thing about the McDonalds is that Alex doesn't like it, but not for the reasons that I assumed. In our time there, he noticed two lesbian school girls, but my eye was more fixed on the amount of preppies that came in. It really felt like I was back home, in an odd way because, well, McDonalds was always full of school kids when I was there.

We finally went back to the theaters and walked right in. I was honestly confused because the place felt like a hole in the wall. You enter, and it was flight of stairs after flight of stairs. I want to note that I am fine taking stairs and that my choice to call yesterday as a struggle was more because the stairs were ancient and at odd angles. These just ridiculously went on forever and even after getting to the ticket taker, we had stairs to go. The theater was also rather small, and about three times smaller than the ones that I am used to. However, I do admire any theater that features a gimmicky curtain that rises when the film starts.

The trailers were interesting, if just because I saw an ad for the green berets. Not exactly world shattering, but the subtle different in foreign trailers really impressed me. Even split cuts in some to slightly more provocative images seemed like an interesting call. Of course, this was a Rated R movie. Don't get me wrong, we get that treatment in the states. It is just that I felt like everything was more openly accepted. Of course, I just want to say that the Place Beyond the Pines trailer looks even more gorgeous on the biggish screen. If you haven't seen Blue Valentine, you are missing out on a masterpiece that justifies why I think that this will be one of the best of the year.

The one thing that is not exactly different, but initially annoyed me was people talking. True, it was a hole in the wall cinema to begin with, but I still am that cinephile who respects the right of silence during a film, no matter how hole in the wall the cinema is. There was a group behind us that I feared was going to bother me more than they did. It was two chicks that were talking loud for the first five minutes of the movie and then continued in a more hushed tone. Also, random parties were talking, admittedly brief, during the picture. In America, or at least in classier picture houses (yes, let's see how many synonyms I can shove in this mother), they would have been yelled at by now. Alex assures me that this is not a fair representation of English theaters, but we'll see when we finally get around to Django Unchained, which is the next on our roster.

The film itself was an odd choice that I wonder how it would have played in summer. As the guy who was anticipating it when it was initially supposed to be released, I tried to see it with the same hype and not the January shit-pile that usually bestows the cineplexes. Really, the psychology that has been instilled in me with that mindset is still rather established, though I argue that it has gotten more lenient in recent times. I am just wondering if it would have played better in September when it was initially supposed to be out.

I am also wondering where the infamous scene had to be removed. It honestly made no sense where a theater shooting fit into that film. Also, I am convinced that remaining footage from that unfortunate footage made it into the final trailers, as you can see glimpses of gun shots in front of movie posters. I am convinced that those are relics of the original footage. However, I do not know how much of a difference the edits were. I mean, they do shoot up a night club and Chinatown. If it wasn't for James Holmes, I would argue why the edit needed to be made. As it stands, I felt like they could have easily been fucked if someone shot up a night club, Chinatown, or hotel.

I will try not to derail with talk of censorship, but I wondered a few things. Gangster Squad received shit for having a theater shooting scene. Django Unchained, being an alternative western, was somehow accused of promoting violence in relation to the Sandy Hook story. However, I haven't heard anyone make any accusations about Inglourious Basterds, which saw a cinema burn to the ground at the end. As I was talking to Alex, blaming the media is dumb. I mean, nobody became a capitalist because of Monopoly.

Of course, Gangster Squad was smart to be moved. It was nonstop action, punching, and shooting. It is violent and while not gorey, it would seem problematic to release it after the James Holmes affair. It really is one of those movies that promotes violence to a ridiculous degree. The question after that is how you like your violence. If it is over the top, you'll at least find something to admire about this story.

However, the reason that I was excited was because of two reasons. Besides my lust to see anything that Ryan Gosling is in, it is also another film by Ruben Fleischer, whose filmography includes 30 Minutes or Less and Zombieland. Technically both should clue you into the graphic nature of Gangster Squad, but as a casual fan of both of those films, it only made me more excited.

So, now that I have bored you with preamble, what did I think of the movie? It was definitely ridiculous and had a formula that seemed to feature almost every conversation ending with someone getting punched in the face. It really was a straight forward excuse for people to get hurt. It also felt subtly cartoony and Sean Penn looked just that way. It was quite peculiar how dark and over the top it chose to be.

But without going into too much, I felt like it was solid. Not amazing, but it definitely was nonstop violence and felt like a Quentin Tarantino-inspired excuse for excess. Ryan Gosling was a little bit odd. He talked in a sweet tone, but his dialogue at times felt a little clunky and weird. However, kudos on Michael Pena at least trying to stop playing those dumb gangster roles. So basically, the film isn't exceptionally great, but good enough for an afternoon flick. Has enough fun stuff going for it and I ponder if it would have been better received in a world isolated from James Holmes, violence, shootings, etc.

On the train ride home, we had another interesting adventure. We got on the train after talking about Beavis and Butthead and why it only came back for one season. We also made a lame Schindler's List riff. Alex also found my soft spot, which is somehow doing riffs in which Jason Statham is his typical self, but as James Bond. It isn't very elaborate, but it is so amazingly fun to listen to.

But on the train, we're sitting towards the back and this guy asks me for a bottle of water. He claims that he wants it so that he can wipe cocaine off of his credit card to pay for a ticket. The bathroom is tied up with someone also hiding from the ticket taker. After telling the guy that I didn't have any water, I pretty much stopped talking to him. I was confused, and as it stands, I only understand 90% of what people are saying on this trip anyways.

I heard shout outs to grass and other stuff, like maybe he was drunk or something. I stayed quiet and let Alex take care of all of the interaction. From what I piece together, when the ticket taker came around, the druggie accused us of putting cocaine on his credit card. Smart man, the ticket taker didn't believe him. Later on, the guy even suggested that he pay to get us a drink at the pub in Rye. Great, this guy is getting off in Rye.

So from there, I continued to keep myself free of discussion. However, conversation soon got on Pulp Fiction and that one scene involving a gimp and some sex. Nothing more. He claimed that it was the only part that he remembered. He felt like pulling out money in the middle of the night would feel like getting raped by a man. He later claimed that he wasn't into gay sex, but somehow still defended the scene. It was pretty odd. I tried to politely excuse myself when the train docked and to hopefully keep him from following us, we went to the nearby market to buy soda and chips. However, I saw him get in a car with a guy named Jethro (at least that is the name I collect from asides), so I felt like 10 minutes in a market would put us in the clear.

Back at the house, we watched some Threesome and contemplated the day ahead. We have found that the nights are the most problematic aspect of the trip. We have nothing to do. I suggested games, but that was misconstrued as video games. Either way, we're trying to get that straightened out. I have no idea what will come of it.

We also briefly chatted with Natalie over the internet. I saw Alex play her a song and somehow Alex doesn't have to try hard to make me laugh. He can play guitar and sing in a wonky register, and that will get me every time. I didn't really get to know Natalie, but continuing my theory that I will marry a cat person, I did see her cat and that was far more interesting than anything else I saw in her room. I actually did that dumb swooning thing.

Eventually Viv got home and we just stayed up chatting about the future. We got to the point that we changed the plans for the next day from London to Brighton, which Alex assures me is a better choice. I mean, anywhere that produces Fatboy Slim can be better than London? Yeah, if you're jamming inside a large octopus.

It was overall an odd night of me just noticing subtle differences. For some reason, I was fascinated by how long everyone talked about the things that they disagreed on. The burgers were oddly the tip off that I needed to say something. All that did was make Viv address it as being normal. Of course, she used my whole name, which always makes me feel weird. As much as I am fine with people calling me Thomas, Willett has always been an odd place that made me feel like I was about to be punished. It felt like the family being disowned in some way.

Don't get me wrong, the conversations were fun and I am getting a lot to enjoy about the evenings. However, I guess just that they talk about the good and bad of burgers for more than 20 seconds seems weird to me. Of course, I blame my father for that. He and my sister are very much uninspired when it comes to having an extended conversation on defense against their dark arts. It actually feels good. Usually I only have these rants with my mother, and I find it more cathartic than a brief "we like homemade soup, deal with it."

I went to bed and fell asleep a half hour later. However, something that has become an obsession with me is reading reviews for movies that I just saw. I decided that /Filmcast was a good call. I tried to listen to it, but I passed out at some point. Also, I want to take this moment to promote the Downcast app. Katey Rich tipped me off to it months ago, and I bought it just for this trip. It updates my shows every hour and it is so efficient. I cannot see me going back to the dumb Podcasts app. There is just so much more efficiency in this whole brouhaha. The searching is also easier.

So yeah, not much else to report on. It wasn't really an eventful day besides getting to see how Alex recommends violent movies to the women in his life. I don't know Viv's tastes all that well, but I feel like the motherly types in my life are not quite into shoot 'em ups. That was probably the most interesting thing. Alex recommending Gangster Squad to Viv. My mom would have shut it down quickly. Also, I need to see the Untouchables now. I like Brian De Palma films, but I haven't seen that one. I just feel like there are similarities. I did see L.A. Confidential, before you wonder why I don't say the more obvious similar one.

Anyways, that's probably it for right now. Pictures will be resurrected eventually. Keep an eye out for that stuff. Otherwise, today should be a lot of fun. I'll be talking at you later.

QUESTION: What is William?

Day 3 (Jan. 15): "I'm not used to stairs in general."

ANSWER: This name, like that of a girl in Harry Potter, is derived from the name of Hermes, Messenger of the Gods.

 

 

-Day Three-

 

I went to bed around 6 PM on Monday. Tired, exhausted, I was ready for that long sleep that would put me up at maybe 10 PM the next morning. Really, when I am up for over 20+ hours, I usually end up sleeping super long. No expectations on being up any earlier. I don't even remember the time it took to get comfortable in the bed and fall asleep. It seemed to happen almost momentarily after walking up the stairs and closing the door.

When I woke up, I had this odd sense of refreshment. I felt good. I looked at the time and when I saw that it was 10, I knew that it had to be 10 AM. I wouldn't be awake four hours later and feeling great. I took to the internet and began just writing about my first day there. I was just too enthused to do it.

Never mind that the sun wasn't out. I was just under the assumption that English weather is really, really messed up. Dark until noon, or something like that. However, the further that I looked into things, I began to realize that it was indeed 10 PM, and I was confused. After a quick trip to the bathroom, I met Alex in the hall, who told me that he would be downstairs for awhile to talk. After a bath, we did just that. Everyone was down there, and Viv was watching her "who done it?" show, which if I gather properly, it was called Lewis. In many ways, I just began to correlate that my guardians for the time are no different than my parents. They have familiar passions and concerns.

Then after an hour, I went back to my room, and Alex insisted that I fight my internal clock and get some sleep. I wasn't exactly tired, but I wanted to believe him. However, my iPod was mere inches from grasp, so I put on my headphones and that made up the next four hours.

I'm sitting around in the room, in the dark just blaring music for awhile. It began with a little OutKast's "Stankonia," with notable play on "B.O.B." which lead to me doing a light show with my iPod. It was a rather poor show, but I felt like I needed to keep myself entertained. I eventually segued into West Side Story and the Mulan soundtrack. I even got bored enough to search the internet, where I found a video detailing the Top 10 Worst Songs of 2011. It was by chance that I found it, and it was not an exceptional video. The guy was royally cynical and hated on obvious songs. God, were there some bad songs on that list. I decided to actually check out one of them for the hell of it. I have heard comedian Howard Kremer talking about this artist and well... why not? I think it was Kreyashawn or something really uninspired. It almost made me depressed to realize that people actually went through with writing this music and putting their face to the music.

On a better note, Anne Marsen is working on a music video and will be touring around the globe. She's also do a video blog a day, which almost coincides with my stay here. I'll try to get the name for you tomorrow. However, I do admit that it at times feels inessential, though it only makes me love her more. She has a cat that she calls Garfield incarnate. I have a cat that I call the same thing. She is so adorable and I loved her more after I found out she had a tabby. I don't think watching any of these will convince you why I love her (speaking her boyfriend is in almost all of the videos), but the IKEA video should be a nice, cohesive view into why I think she's cool. Such a free spirit. However, because of the time difference, I don't see these until 3 AM on a typical schedule.

I went to bed around four. I woke up around 10, and I feel like maybe I was going to be fixed. However, step one of jetlag was over. Step two, which haunted me for most of the day, was about to begin. I didn't expect it, but for the entire day, my digestion system was acting all wonky. I would have meals, but feel queasy for the next hour, often needing to go to the bathroom repeatedly. Also, I did have a lot of drinks, including a ton of soda, some juice, and a couple glasses of hot tea. I don't know why, but the fluids have been on tap most of the time since I arrived. Kind of thankful, for sure.

Chris was down listening to his blues show and doing stuff. I had some cereal, and sat around watching Alex make fun of the music. After taking some time to wake up, we decided to start me off with a simple trip around Rye, where we would get to see the town and I would get to take in all of the culture. Truthfully, another issue with the first two days was disbelief that I was in England. I still had yet to grasp that I was actually overseas. As of writing this, I feel like maybe I am finally accepting everything.

For starters, the town looks very much what I imagine the definition of traditionalist. The architecture rose to the sky, it looked really old. There was a cobbled street. Even Shakespeare's cowriter has a memorial plaque. Also, there is a church here that I am seriously wondering if it is bigger or on par with the Crystal Cathedral. I don't know, but that was a big building.

I also saw a banner for the National Lottery, which has been my favorite thing to spot in movies. I want a shirt with that logo so badly. It is just so silly and fun. But it is a gorgeous sight. We looked around and the fact that the town ends shortly out of eyeline and the rivers and marsh are all almost aesthetically pleasing. I called it a classy version of Wyoming.

One of our first stops was a place that I am sure that we'll visit again and again. It is a pub called the Standard, which for starters has TWO fireplaces and a million underground tunnels. It also blew my mind that the bricks were real and that what I take for novelty turns out to be real, genuine stuff. The wall designs, the furnishing. It all was honest and authentic. I felt like I was in an odd paradox where the novelty was now inverted to genuine.

 

The Standard's standard glasses filled with Coke

The Standard's standard salt and pepper shakers

 

After that, we decided to head over to the church and take a look inside. It was big, gaping, and the architecture looked nice. Alex really admired the arches and would like to buy some. After paying the information teller, we got access to go up to the room. Apparently the view from the top is excellent.

Of course, that is after 84 steps. The information teller warned us about that. It wasn't so much a problem going up, though being vertically inclined, I did have trouble making it all the way without running out of breath. Luckily there was a resting room halfway through and we took that moment to indulge on everything. There's also a nice view of the church along the way up those first flights of stairs. I must admit that for some reason, I have come to admire aerial views in recent years, and being able to see the church from different angles was rather nice.

We also passed the room where the bells were kept. That was the last trek of space before we made it to the roof. A lot of bells in the room:

 



 

 

 

 

 

 It was quite a sight to look at the bells. However, it was time for the main attraction. Onto the roof we went. Once we opened the door, Alex went into tourist mode, admiring the view and taking a whole lot of pictures. I asked what buildings were and he usually answered. He also told me that the aenemic windmills that I was talking about were wind turbines. Growing up near Simi Valley, I always called them windmills. However, he pointed out a very gorgeous, old school windmill in the distance that I felt was very Dutch.

It really was a gorgeous sight and as I said, I have really gotten into aerial views. I don't have vertigo, but I was cautious of the edges because I didn't want to jump off. It isn't an impulse, but I do have that thought. Alex, for the most part, is the photographer for most of this trip. You may see some when I return home, but I am an uninspired photographer in comparison. I just charged batteries last night and took a go at photographing stuff. You'll see some dull cat pictures, for sure.

Want to know how great he is at the pictures? I'd say that I shouldn't be allowed near a camera when I have to compare to these:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I tell ya, he's really good at the pictures. It was a great view and we somehow lost track of time. We were up there for awhile, enjoying ourselves. Alex apologized for being the tourist, but I was just taking it all in. We eventually went back downstairs to the waiting room in between the stairs in order to just get warm. It was edging along two o'clock at the time, and we decided to wait in the bell room to watch them go off. Somehow, at two, they went off three times, and they were pretty damn loud. Alex complained about ringing, but it didn't bother me as much.

The trouble with the stairs is that I didn't really know how to go down them properly. It took a few flights to finally get it right. This place has so many stairs that I probably will get fit just walking up and down so many. We talked to the information lady before leaving and soon we were on our way.

Other misc. pictures from the church:

 

 

 

Those are the gears for the clock. I saw the pendulum, but I cannot justify where the clock actually was. We went to the roof, and that was the extent to our searching.

After leaving, we went to Grammar School Records, which I thought was a school records hall, but Alex assured me was a record shop. I found a vinyl print of the most influential comedy bit in my life in that store: Bob Newhart's "Driving Instructor." I didn't know that they had a single version of that. I was so impressed and if I didn't own "Buttoned Down Mind," I would be so tempted to buy it, even if I don't listen to vinyl with regularity. The place was small, but we got the point across. Nothing that grabbed me, but it felt good to see some culture. Also, upon returning to the house Chris informed me that HMV, which is their big music outlet chain, just got sold. Yep, things are tough all over.

Alex even showed me Pedo Point, which is where a telescope outlooks over a playground. Quite a sight.

 

I really should stop saying quite a sight. I just feel like this country looks good. At very least, different from what I am used to.

He was a busy photographer. Here's the remaining batch from our walk around town. He assures me that there is more to see in Rye and that we won't all blow it at once:

 

 

 

 

 

The remaining portion of the day was uneventful. We didn't go anywhere or do anything. However, we did watch Kung Fu Friday on a copy that I made for Alex. It unfortunately gets out of sync in the last 15 minutes, but we still love it. It is so odd to think that it is six years old and Marrs is an award winning filmmaker now. We admit that the quality is bad, but it is still one of our favorites. I am sure that this won't be the last time that we watch that DVD. I promised Alex that we will listen to the commentary. Rewatching the movie, I admit that there are subtle things that I remember from the commentary that make that film so much better.

We also watched Threesome, which is part of "Operation: Represent English Culture" that is somehow of prominent focus on this trip. The plot is rather bizarre, in that a couple and their gay friend have sex together, and the woman is pregnant with the gay man's baby. I really don't know how you make a series out of that, but I am so intrigued to find out. I am not wanting to say that it has the same plot as the New Normal, but both are equally progressively weird. However, I feel like Threesome at least tackles the subject of pregnancy with some oddity and fun without being blasphemous ot segregations outside of the initial cast. I mean, the second episode involves giving up drugs, then digging up those drugs and snorting them and then crashing through a Lego Taj Mahal. It has the human side necessary to make it work. I feel like the New Normal is an attempt at capturing that in your face humor, but done so poorly. I mean, I watched 8 episodes of the New Normal, so I am not even lying when I say this.

Alex then ran into a kurfufle and had to handle things in his room. He was busy for a big majority of the day. Chris took over as MC and we bonded over a Top Gear special on James Bond. Not caring for the series, I at least figured that it was a good time to see what British people felt about what is one of their most familiar exports. Chris was really into it, and while I cannot get into the films, the ingenuity that went into their cars was exceptionally at least ingenious. Movie magic and non-special effects things tend to impress me sometimes.

We also got around to watching It Might Get Loud, which was inspired by Chris' conversation about guitars. He thought that I might enjoy it. Initially, I found genuine humor in him calling Jack White as Jack Black. However, I cannot remember most of the movie, but I remember really enjoying the Jack White bits a lot. He really is an old school musician and one that I enjoy. Also, getting all of the British people together was fun, especially when it came to making fun of the Edge. Yeah, I get the feeling like Brits in general dislike U2. That was so charming.

I spent the remained of the night discussing plans for the next day, talking to Viv, and listening to WTF with Marc Maron in my room. Maron's conversation with Elizabeth Banks was interesting, if just because I feel like she is a more likeable, intelligent version of Jenny McCarthy on some issues. I disagree that Pitch Perfect is at all a good movie, but I will let her have her opinion. Another late night, but I feel like more than the previous night, I was adjusted. I just need to figure out how to break my recent curse of using technology to go to bed really late. That, my friends, is the downfall of society.

So, watching out for ice on the ground will be fun. I almost tripped on the way back today. No injuries yet. Still, surprised that the weather is as good as it has been. Been expecting it to be miserable. However, we're off to Hastings for the day to go see Gangster Squad and remind me what Los Angeles looks like. Of course, any excuse to see Ryan Gosling (or as Alex puts it: Ronny Rosley) is good enough for me.

 

No more teasers for tomorrow. I am trying to not become that guy. However, with this post, I hopefully will be back on track to the one-a-day turnout that I have wanted to maintain. Hope that you have enjoyed things, and I hope that I will also share more stories on the cuisine and culture, as I feel like you now know what the buildings look like.

 

 

QUESTION: What is Hermione?